Slow Down
Is it healthy to be friends with your ex, especially if you still have feeling for them? I'm not asking for myself but for a stranger.
My mouth hurts because it's finally got the retainer back in it. It's painful as always, tight too but give it a couple more days and I'll be back to normal. I'm also asking if it's normal to have your head hurt like hell when your teeth are adjusting. That part just below my temples is hurting and I don't know what it relates to. Either stress or teeth I suppose.
That fan fiction that I dearly love so much is complete and I finished it again recently. It hurts, the ending was so sudden. I'm not complaining, it is an amazing read but I want more. I want to know what happens to them later, when he goes on to pursue ballet and the other continues his life of crime. I want to see them break up and make up over and over and hurt so bad. I want to know all their dirty secrets. And maybe that's me trying to runaway and create a new life inside my head because of my boring reality but I don't care; I want it so badly.
I realised my headache was from my hair being tied too tight. It's left open now, and damn it feels good.
One more thing I did today is watch Legend of Korra. It is getting interesting but I'm having serious withdrawal issues from the first Avatar series. The action and humor of ATLA compared to LOK is more amiable. I'm not good with new things, which is a reason that I'm trying to make going to university an adventure.
I'm wasting my time thinking I'll graduate with a business degree and plan that great underground world or something of my own. I want to do something with my life and I want to be known. That's why this mafia/organised crime idea is so intriguing to me. This whole "badass" image is what I try so hard to attain when in reality, I'm just an innocent little girl who known next to nothing about struggle and hardships like those in gangs. It's not a gang really, it's a team; that's my first faux pas. Secondly, I get my perception of that life from fan fiction writing by teenagers like me or movies made by millionaire billionaire producers who are more likely than not upholding "the stereotypes." I want adventure, thrill, and danger like in the movies but do I want my life to be cut short from bad decisions? Not really. Do I want to play a videogame about this life I want? Not at all. So in what way can I bring excitement into my life and still guarantee my death at age 83?
My mouth hurts because it's finally got the retainer back in it. It's painful as always, tight too but give it a couple more days and I'll be back to normal. I'm also asking if it's normal to have your head hurt like hell when your teeth are adjusting. That part just below my temples is hurting and I don't know what it relates to. Either stress or teeth I suppose.
That fan fiction that I dearly love so much is complete and I finished it again recently. It hurts, the ending was so sudden. I'm not complaining, it is an amazing read but I want more. I want to know what happens to them later, when he goes on to pursue ballet and the other continues his life of crime. I want to see them break up and make up over and over and hurt so bad. I want to know all their dirty secrets. And maybe that's me trying to runaway and create a new life inside my head because of my boring reality but I don't care; I want it so badly.
I realised my headache was from my hair being tied too tight. It's left open now, and damn it feels good.
One more thing I did today is watch Legend of Korra. It is getting interesting but I'm having serious withdrawal issues from the first Avatar series. The action and humor of ATLA compared to LOK is more amiable. I'm not good with new things, which is a reason that I'm trying to make going to university an adventure.
I'm wasting my time thinking I'll graduate with a business degree and plan that great underground world or something of my own. I want to do something with my life and I want to be known. That's why this mafia/organised crime idea is so intriguing to me. This whole "badass" image is what I try so hard to attain when in reality, I'm just an innocent little girl who known next to nothing about struggle and hardships like those in gangs. It's not a gang really, it's a team; that's my first faux pas. Secondly, I get my perception of that life from fan fiction writing by teenagers like me or movies made by millionaire billionaire producers who are more likely than not upholding "the stereotypes." I want adventure, thrill, and danger like in the movies but do I want my life to be cut short from bad decisions? Not really. Do I want to play a videogame about this life I want? Not at all. So in what way can I bring excitement into my life and still guarantee my death at age 83?
~C.
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