To Die

What is the correct punctuation for the following sentence: "Mirror mirror on the wall"? 

I have 0 reasons for wanting anything right now. Nothing authentic could brighten my spirits today. Artificially, I could be be high or I could be smiling but in reality, I'm still as worn as my old used-to-be-black Chuck Taylors. If anything, those shoes are a metaphor for my life. Since graduating grade 9, I've been worn out, torn, and generally been through so much that I'm falling apart. Yet, I still love these shoes and want to cherish them. The precious memories they hold onto is worth more than the $60 they cost. 

Right now, I could be not experiencing a pain my chest when I breathe. My back could be in A+ condition and I could be genuinely happy. But because of the world I live in, right now I can feel my heart pounding against my chest, I couldn't get up this morning and I am postponing my present happiness for happiness in the future. Who can tell me for sure that I have a future? 

I'm in university. I thought infatuation, hatred for classes, and assholes would not exist here. But I'm confused about my feelings, and dreading mornings because of classes that I'm doing less than exceptional in and I'm annoyed by most people. This embarrassing life was not meant for me. The fact that I'm looking around and not seeing anyone else like me is disheartening. I've lost purpose in wanting to be here. I'm letting myself go. I'm dressing weakly, I don't care about my hair (my theme song used to be Lady Gaga's Hair) Today, my theme song is Always Awake. It's not the change I was seeking. 

This post is weak. I am weakening. What is there I can do? I can't reach out to anyone because I don't know what to say. I don't want to sound crazy, I don't want to cry. I'm losing weight and I am scared to show even my wrists today. They are skin and bones. 

Is this what I amount to after all these years? I'm too young to die but I'm too done to live. Unsure of whether I'm still discovering myself or if I've lost who I am, I will continue to go with the flow and do what I need to. I've given up on being different. 

~C.