Princess Status
I always tell myself this, but I end up not listening ever. The thing is, once someone is nice to me, like extremely nice, I feel like they might be into me. And that might be because usually people are mega-douches and even a small amount of kindness makes me happy. So when I see it, and I feel the same way back I get so excited. Turns out, there are nice people in the world and they friendzone me. I like to think of myself as a princess who can get guys to do anything for me. To an extent, that is true. I'm super cute and all that.
The reason for me bringing this up is that a guy at school, who I am (was?) infatuated with doesn't like me in that way. And I supposed I could've guessed that but that's not the point. The point is that he feels like he's leading me on and maybe I got lured in by that. This whole experience has put a dent in my ego. My princess status is deteriorating and I'm just gonna be "one of the guys" again. Not that I mind, I love being the only girl amongst like 5 guys. It boosts my ego sometimes. So talking about this made me feel slightly better, or worse, about all this.
I'm very stressed out. I need a 72% to reach a 2.0 in business statistics. I've been sitting here for about 3 hours, maybe 4, trying to figure this stuff out. I think I understand most of what I did but I'm not sure.
It's 0138 right now, I'm hungry, sleepy, and not done the last question on this past assignment. His name is circulating through my mind. I wish he'd share the same feelings for me as I do for him. Mostly curiosity, confusion, interest. I like his vibes, I enjoy talking to him, standing next to him. He's got a gentle personality. He's soft like the rap I like. If I could describe the feelings he gives me, it'd be Jazzyfact's Life's Like album. Mellow, soft, but still thug enough to pass off as rap, or in this case, pass off as me.
Suddenly, writing this blog post doesn't seem like a chore. Not right now at least. Thinking about that essay that was supposed to be due tomorrow (or the 15th) makes me uneasy though.
Why can't I stop thinking about him? Infatuation eats you, I swear it does. It eats at the things you deem to be most important to you. But having close friends who know a lot of people really helps.
My hopes are still alive!
The reason for me bringing this up is that a guy at school, who I am (was?) infatuated with doesn't like me in that way. And I supposed I could've guessed that but that's not the point. The point is that he feels like he's leading me on and maybe I got lured in by that. This whole experience has put a dent in my ego. My princess status is deteriorating and I'm just gonna be "one of the guys" again. Not that I mind, I love being the only girl amongst like 5 guys. It boosts my ego sometimes. So talking about this made me feel slightly better, or worse, about all this.
I'm very stressed out. I need a 72% to reach a 2.0 in business statistics. I've been sitting here for about 3 hours, maybe 4, trying to figure this stuff out. I think I understand most of what I did but I'm not sure.
It's 0138 right now, I'm hungry, sleepy, and not done the last question on this past assignment. His name is circulating through my mind. I wish he'd share the same feelings for me as I do for him. Mostly curiosity, confusion, interest. I like his vibes, I enjoy talking to him, standing next to him. He's got a gentle personality. He's soft like the rap I like. If I could describe the feelings he gives me, it'd be Jazzyfact's Life's Like album. Mellow, soft, but still thug enough to pass off as rap, or in this case, pass off as me.
Suddenly, writing this blog post doesn't seem like a chore. Not right now at least. Thinking about that essay that was supposed to be due tomorrow (or the 15th) makes me uneasy though.
Why can't I stop thinking about him? Infatuation eats you, I swear it does. It eats at the things you deem to be most important to you. But having close friends who know a lot of people really helps.
My hopes are still alive!
~C.
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